Not Today Satan Patch Beanie

Technically you're leaving the door open for tomorrow, but today you are unavailable.

"Not Today Satan" started as drag house slang, got claimed by every corner of the dark aesthetic internet, and somehow still lands. It belongs here. There's a version of this sentiment on a bumper sticker outside a megachurch and a completely different version on this beanie, worn by someone who has a genuine opinion about which Danzig era was best. The embroidered patch keeps it looking like a considered choice rather than fast fashion sarcasm, which is the whole point.

Knitted acrylic with an embroidered Not Today Satan patch. One size fits most teen to adult head sizes.